Ever look back on yourself a decade and some past… and wonder what the hell were you thinking? From the perspective I have today, when I look back like this I’m humbled by the things I didn’t know. I thought I had so much figured out. I was wrong.
I was having one of these moments recently, so I started a list of things I wish I knew in my 30’s. Here’s my list, The Top-10 Things I Wish I Knew then, (beginning here with the first 4).
If you’ve got any that come up, please share them below.
1. Healthy joints are vital for a strong body:
When you’re living active and strength training daily your joints take a beating. Of course exercising and strength training are vital for joint health, within reason, but even a good things have limits. And eventually life and training wears on your joints. You can’t prevent this but you can make informed decisions.
When I was in my 30’s I didn’t think much about my joints—because they rarely hurt. And when they did, it was mostly irritating. Pain here and there, occasionally it’d get worse, and eventually it would go away.
In my 40’s I’ve come to know, love and respect my joints. Every day I deal with pains and injury, most of which can be tracked back to the decades of training. Not that I would or could trade the training but given the wisdom of today, I would be more respectful and take better care of my joints.
In Summary:
There are simply some lifts I would not do; like overhead shoulder pressing. I’ve also come to know the cost of decades of heavy squatting on the lower back. I would not eliminate squats but I’d be more reasonable about weight. Once your back goes, it’s gone for life.
2. On “the other side” of complexity is more complexity.
I appreciate the quote:
“I would not give a fig for the simplicity this side of complexity, but I would give my life for the simplicity on the other side of complexity.”
– Oliver Wendell Holmes
If you don’t quite get it, it may be that you’ve not crossed to the far side (pun intended, Mr. Larsen) of complexity.
From you 20’s on, life is a steady incline of complexity. So much so, that by your mid-30’s arrive, things have generally become so complex you’re required to believe this is it–that it can’t possibly get any more insane, right? Life has got to be getting simpler soon.
In Summary:
Life doesn’t get simpler. There. Now you know. I wish I knew it a decade ago too. It’s more complex, confusing and challenging with more sweet, sour and sadistic texture than you can imagine. Get used to it. Stop waiting for simpler. Embrace it all. It’s all part of the glorious journey.
3. Those little “glitches” can grow into deadly relationship “tumors:”
I’ve seen this one more times than I care to admit—and I’ve experienced more than my fair share of the struggles myself—where seemingly little issues up and into your 30’s grow into debilitating, relationship killers.
From my experience, most people in their 20’s assume they have relationships either all figured out or they simply “is who they is.” Come our 30’s hopefully we begin to get that we’re involved and there are just some things we do that aren’t helpful to relationships.
Unfortunately, although awareness is nice but it’s rarely enough. It may be the beginning of change but a lot of work must precede the end. Thus, we mean well. We’re going to get around to breaking down the wall, the resistance to true intimacy, or whatever it is. But we’re busy and we’re getting by now.
Come 40’s these things we could get away with, the seeming minor flaws, amplify in our own behaviors and in the eyes of those who love us, to the point they’re no longer cute, or “a little difficult.” They’ve become intolerable emotional “tumors” to those around us.
In Summary:
Get clear on what’s working, and what’s not in your 30s and take it serious. Do what it takes to be a better you, now. Before the glitches become tumors and the price of failure sky-rockets to become your life.
4. Diet matters, more and more each year:
I’ve always been active and fit—and been mastering my nutrition since my teens. While I certainly have learned how to manage a diet to get photo-shoot lean, for the most part I could eat the way I eat. Largely because I trained, was in shape and eat well any way.
To be honest, I quietly assumed that when I turned 40 it wouldn’t be that big-a-deal. My body would just do what it’s done. Perhaps a little less effectively but no big thing. And for the most part, that’s true.
But like most everyone else I know in their 40’s getting lean and staying lean is harder—yes, that means it gets harder to get hard. Had to say it.
I find my body less tolerant of excess carbs, more likely to be exhausted and stressed by foods the spike insulin. And given that insulin spiking sugar can drive testosterone down by 25%, safe to say it’s about more the calories and carbs.
It’s this significantly increasing importance on quality nutrition over quantity as we grow less young that inspired the creation of Full Strength. Nutrient rich, insulin stabilizing, energy sustaining, Full Strength can turn your body on and your appetite off.
It’s got more total nutrition than many people get in a full day. And Full Strength sustains your energy and freedom from hunger longer than an 800 calorie breakfast for only 300 perfectly integrated, protein dense calories.
In Summary:
This one is both the toughest in some ways, and the easiest. It’s tough to change the way you eat, if you’re not mastering it already. But it’s a hell of lot tougher on your longer if you don’t. How? Elevate your Nutritional Freedom, apply the practices and rituals from Strength for LIFE, where I show you the way.
And the easy way? Get yourself some Full Strength and begin each day with it, for 14 days and then a life time. I say this because for most men, it takes only 14 days of Full Strength, daily, to really feel how great nutrition can feel–and once you feel it, you don’t want to go back to the way things were before.
Next, #5, #6 and #7…
In part-II, numbers 5-6-7, be ready for insights about speed, skin and the four letter word…










21. November 2011 at 2:25 pm
Awesome insights… I look forward to the next post.
21. November 2011 at 2:29 pm
Shawn, this could not have been more timely for me, and the current state of my life. It seems the complexity of life has increased exponentially, but I sometimes fear that my ability to handle that complexity has not grown at a rate commensurate to the challenge. Thank you, my brother.
21. November 2011 at 2:45 pm
As someone just over halfway through their 30’s I recognise the truth in what you are saying and I am grateful for the benefit of your experience. Here is one thing from my experience; Our hands are miraculous (and contain lots of joints), I recommend switching between a trackball and mouse periodically if you are a heavy computer user. Looking forward to the next installment
21. November 2011 at 3:32 pm
Imflammation has got to fit into this list somewhere
21. November 2011 at 3:47 pm
I’ll give you inflammation! You mean like the sort Viagra promises?
Oh… no, I know what you’re saying. Well see… I’ve got the rest ready but…
21. November 2011 at 3:35 pm
Ya’ TEASE!
Oh well, I patiently await the next in the series.
Joints: I leave near the Canadian border, so “joint” has many meanings. But an absolute truth. I set out to “groove” my Roscoe Tanner serving style when I was 14. 500 balls in an afternoon. And an injured shoulder ever since. If I could reverse that…
I see my Dad, a hard-core tennis player since 1968, not nearly as spritely today with 2 titanium knees and a Ti shoulder to boot. Joints make all the difference. (And so easy to protect if you get the right foods and oils running through that GI tract).
Complexity: Yes, absolutely. Though inevitable (as Bruce Cockburn sings “You Get Bigger As You Go”) – I am also working diligently on reducing non-passionate activity in exchange for fully-engaged activity. Though it may seem the same on the surface, it’s far from it in real-life. The energy-exchange is where it shows up most: Does the activity result in more life energy, mental engagement – or more stress, cortisol buildup and adrenal burnout? Get in touch with how activities feel, and make the exchange – or eliminate if possible. Less is truly more. (but escape is a whole ‘nuther story). And your comment about “embracing it all”: absolutely. Or it will drive you to drinkin’. Eddie Vedder’s version of Release is my mantra when I am feeling the overwhelm: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GA3_A7tk3Y0
Relationships: Dude, you get the fix on this, and Wayne Dyer, John Gray and hell, even Eben “David D’Angelo” Pagan will resign in peace.
Diet: Essential. THE essential. See the stress-making, body crumbling points above? Yeah – healthy eating, body-loving, insulin-sensitivity empowering diet dulls 80% of the prior (and I bet, forthcoming) bullet points you’ve offered today.
Thanks man. That’s a serious Start Strong Monday.
21. November 2011 at 3:47 pm
Yes, yes and yes… well done Mark!
21. November 2011 at 3:40 pm
Shawn, today is my 48th birthday. Thanks for the thoughtful “birthday present”…you speak wisdom. I’m going in to the doctors today to discuss what I can do to take better care of myself!
21. November 2011 at 8:27 pm
Shawn, what specific steps should one take to protect the joints? Any specific exercises/stretches and/or supplements?
21. November 2011 at 8:50 pm
Shawn,
Some excellent points. I’m 47 and agree wholeheartedly with your observations.
For those youngsters out there that think this stuff ain’t happenin’ to me, think again. That’s we all thought too!
Question: You mentioned you would not do overhead presses if you had to do it over again, what would you do to get similar results w/o injury?
Thanks and keep up the good work.
Alan
24. November 2011 at 12:23 pm
Shawn,
Great insight on the lower back and shoulders. The 5×5 days of heavy squats are in the rearview mirror. The sets of 8 with a more manageable weight is just fine for this father of three.
This will probably aggrevate some, but I just turn 41 and struggle to maintain my ideal weight of 155. In my 30s, I wish I knew that every (OK, mostly every) “guru” focused solely on weight loss.
I’m sure I am in the minority, but it would be great if you could put the focus on a future post on those who are at their ideal weight or would like to put on 5 or 10 quality pounds.
Thanks, Steve
28. November 2011 at 4:32 pm
Thanks to the knowledge and friendship of Shawn Phillips, I was able to pre-plan for my 30’s in my 20’s! Now in my mid-thirties I feel like NOTHING can stop me…well unless I’m out of Full Strength!
Thanks Shawn!